It's hard to believe that it's been a whole year since we lost Jake. We were still in the hospital with him, but he was gone. It's been really tough to think back on the time just before the accident. Last week I kept thinking a year ago we only had a few more precious days with him. I am so glad that I was blissfully unaware of the nightmare that was lurching just around the corner. I know for sure that things happen for a reason and that he is in heaven where he is supposed to be, but that doesn't always make it any easier, especially now on the anniversary of this tragic event. I just want him with me sooooo bad. To hear him talk and laugh and discover new things. Our family doesn't seem complete without him. Whenever we go some place I am very aware of him being gone and wishing for him to be with us and have fun.

Everyone have been so nice to us. I feel like talking about him all the time, but I know that people get tired of that, which is understandable, even so, that's how I feel. The head stone that we ordered for his grave has not arrived yet, but we are hoping it will be here for the time that he was buried in a couple of weeks.

There was a 17 year old kid that drowned here at Deer Creek last week. He was an excellent athlete and had just been to football camp at BYU the week before. They say he got a cramp while swimming and the water was extremely cold because of the late run off. I am sad for his family. In one way it makes me relieved that all of that is behind us, but I know that there is still a lot of healing that they are going to have to go through. It is dang hard to lose a child! No matter how old they are.

I think I have posted this on here before, but I love it so much that I am posting it again. It is something that C.S. Lewis wrote:
"Imagine yourself as a living house. God comes in to rebuild that house. At first, perhaps, you can understand what He is doing. He is getting the drains right and stopping the leaks in the roof and so on: you knew those jobs needed doing and so you are not surprised. But presently He starts knocking the house about in a way that hurts abominably and does not seem to make sense. What on earth is He up to? The explanation is that He is building quite a different house from the one you thought of - throwing out a new wing here, putting on an extra floor there, running up towers, making courtyards. You thought you were going to be made into a decent little cottage: but He is building a palace."

I just love this, cause it just goes to show that our plans are not His plans, and He is preparing us for something greater, something that we as mere mortals probably can't understand until we are face to face with Him again and we can say: Oh, that's why this had to happen to me/us!" I LOVE my Heavenly Father and although I don't get all that He has planned for me I know that it will make sense in the end.

Yesterday after church, our friends Dan and Lauralee Ivie invited us to go with them to Prove River Falls. We had a great time. We hiked, brought a picnic lunch and the kids went sledding. Yes, sledding in July! We drove up to just over 10,000 feet and there was a lot of snow. I took pictures and will post them here later. It was great to be out and not sit home and think about what day it was.

The kids have wanted to sleep outside for a while, so last night Derick and the kids did. I thought for sure that they would end up coming inside sometime during the night, but when I woke up this morning, they were still out there:) I am so glad that our kids have such an awesome dad, he is the best and I thank God for him every day:)